• Shela

I Ask a Group of Strangers: What Is Your Definition of Self-Care?

Are you struggling to understand what self-care means to you? If so, this post will be helpful for you! In this post, we explore many different meanings of self-care. You can read them and see which one resonates with you most.


If you have done my free “Self-Care Made Simple” workbook, you’d know my definition of self-care. My definition of self-care is simple. To me, self-care is knowing what is good for you and what makes you happy, and actually doing them even when it's difficult. It is asking your mind, body, and soul, "What do you need right now?" and then doing it.


We are not talking about things that might provide you momentary happiness but is actually harmful to you in the long run like smoking cigarettes or taking drugs but the things that might not seem the most fun but are truly good for you and will benefit you in the future.


However, I understand that the meaning of self-care might differ from person to person as well as evolve over time so I posted "What is your definition of self-care?" to a Facebook Group I just joined. There were many answers but these are a few that I love:

"Self-care is Self-discipline. To be able to do things that are out of your comfort zone is the greatest form of self-love you can give yourself. Because deep down you love yourself so much you refuse to not grow. 🙂” Raval Kaur

It’s an interesting take on self-care. I never thought of self-discipline as a form of self-care. I definitely second going outside your comfort zone! I always learn so much about myself and the world around me when I step outside of my comfort zone.


“For me, Self-care is acknowledging how you feel and then choose the kindest action for yourself at that moment 💖”

I love this! Acknowledging how you feel and being kind to yourself is very important.


“Knowing yourself. Doing what you want and not what others expect from you. Knowing the inner and true you, not the one others made us. Being true to ourselves. And even if we make mistakes we shouldn't let that stick to our mind like a fungus instead learn from it”

Yes! Agreed. This is the first point I made in my Self-Care workbook. You need to have a good knowledge of yourself and be true to yourself to truly practice self-care.



“I feel like it’s having the right boundaries to maintain your own happiness and choosing yourself when it matters most”

Creating and respecting your own boundaries is definitely an important part of self-care.


“Self-care to me means investing in trauma healing.”

It is so amazing that this person knows what they should focus on in their self-care journey. I applaud them for acknowledging their trauma and taking steps to heal. It requires a lot of courage and strength.


“Self-care to me is doing things that make you happy, doing what benefits your well-being, always making sure that you make decisions that make you feel good without infringing on other people’s rights and well-being.”

Yes, I love that this includes that one’s self-care actions shouldn’t infringe on other people’s rights and well-being!


“To look myself in the mirror and smile, knowing that I love myself for who I am and what I will become. 💙 Peace”

My heart feels so warm reading this. It is such a beautiful definition of self-care.


“Hi Shela, to be honest - I am so new to this, no idea yet. But what I can contribute after a very few weeks: stick to it, other newbies. It is so crazy weird (still is). It starts to help in the worst black and panicked moments.”

I love this so so much. Everyone starts somewhere and it’s okay not to have it all figured out. Congratulations on starting your self-care journey!


Which definition do you resonate with? What is YOUR definition of self-care? Let me know in the comment section below!

If you want to get better at self-care and not sure how to start your self-care journey, check out my FREE "Self-Care Made Simple" workbook here.

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